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Born: 6 June 1995
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OoC Member Name: Bee
Age: 22
Occupation: UMM Bookstore Clerk | Junior
Profile: http://willtolive2.b1.jcink.com/index.php?showtopic=2766
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Jenny DuNyl

UMM Student

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Yesterday at 08:18 pm
you never told me what it was that made you strong
or what it was that made you weak

Jenny DuNyl (x) & Joshua David
[ warnings for parental neglect / abuse, self loathing ]



(It's June again.

It's time again for him to come.)


Jenny's twenty second birthday passes with no fuss. Claire surprises her with gifts, a party of two, and then the next day things go as normal. Except, except, except she knows what comes after again. She's been tense for weeks, remembering what came next. (It's time for him to come again, ask those invasive questions about her life, it's time for her not to be good enough again, not smart enough, not trying.)

Since Cora called her out in January, since seeing her again in February, since playing accompaniment in that fucking concert, she's felt more thinned out than usual. A thread ready to snap.

Of course it would happen when he was there.

(Evelyn.

One word is all it takes in that disgusted mocking tone of his, and she hates the way her voice sounds when it raises. When she's screaming into her father's face, what would you know!? what would you know!? you don't care about me, what would you know!?

She hates the way her father's fingers steeple together, watching her silently with cold cold eyes when she's brushed his coffee cup to the ground. It shatters to pieces. Claire has her hands on Jenny's shoulders, trying to hold her back, but by that point she's come to herself again. Rips herself away from both of them and bolts out the door.

She's left her phone behind purposely.

She doesn't want to be found.

She has her wallet though.

She thinks she wants to run away again.)


She doesn't realize where she's letting the bus take her until she sees the familiar patches of blueberries all around the road. It freezes her up, how easily it came, like reflex, like it took no thought at all. It has her crying again, digging her nails into her arms, hating herself, thinking he's right about me

I'm weak.


Instead of stopping where she knows she can get to the Sterling house in a fifteen minute walk, Jenny rides the bus to the end, where they drop her off in front of a cabin like building that served as a registration and pit stop to Moosick State Park.

When she was younger she used to run away from home a lot. When she was younger, once she came here.

She remembers a boy from high school who used to camp here on weekends when it was warmer. She remembers he let her stay with her, asked nothing of it but talk about her parents, about Claire. I hear they were in the military? and he loved that shit.

Then he joined, moved away.


She's two hours into the night, having left the rest stop just ten minutes ago and setting herself out with a sleeping bag she'd bought there before the shop closed up. She thinks she'll sleep nearby, the bathrooms there never close and there's always an attendant just in case a camper falls into trouble in the middle of the night.

She's curled up and stared at the grass, and time slips by just that fast.

She doesn't even move until she hears a sound. A soft meow from the brush that she goes to investigate.

She finds a cat

(she thinks its that cat, the same one she met by the beach. but also, that's impossible, isn't it?)

It takes another few minutes to coax the creature to her, lift it up in her arms and stand. It takes those few minutes, and a second more, to look up and realize she's being watched.

But when she does, Jenny jumps back.

"Uh... hey. Is this your cat?"
Mar 8 2017, 08:53 AM
    AND I DON'T WANT TO FIT WHEREVER
    Jenny DuNyl & Cora Sterling
    warnings ( ffr obsessive relationships, violent thoughts, self depreciation, parental neglect / abuse, self harm, suicidal ideation )
    wearing

If she had thought that it would have caused Jenny to see Cora Sterling again, she's certain Claire wouldn't have asked her to do this.

Granted, it probably would have happened anyway.

They can't seem to get away from each other, after all.

***

Someone had needed piano accompaniment, and their usual pianist had gotten sick just a week before some important recital, some audition, some form of application. Jenny isn't entirely certain of the details, admittedly wasn't listening too well after the initial handshake except to gather that she was supposed to play for one of Claire's students, that she was going to smile and nod and say yes, okay, sure. Even when Claire took her aside and asked are you sure? you don't have to...

no, no, Claire, it's fine

yes, okay, sure


Claire likes it when she picks up an instrument. When she was younger she went through several: cello and piano and violin and bass and ukelele and guitar and...

well,

only a few of them stuck, anyway. They don't have a piano in their apartment, so it's been a while since she's practiced that and Jenny wonders but doesn't ask why Claire didn't think to find someone who actually cared about this sort of thing. But, no matter. She's aware that she's fairly good at this sort of thing, can read music fairly easily and can pick up notes and sounds like apparently few can. It's like riding a bike, apparently, to her, it's hard to forget. These things just fall open in her hands. Even if she doesn't care, she supposes someone like her would be best for a whatever only a week or so away.

(no, no, Claire, it's fine... yes, okay, sure and keep smiling and keep smiling even though Claire is one of two people who sees straight through you like you're nothing but glass... no matter, she doesn't call you on it)

She thinks anyone else could do it better if they tried, though

(it's only music, and her father's voice is always there when she plays whatever instrument she was practicing at the time, just a waste of time

Claire likes it when she plays, though...

so did...)

her fingers stumble at the thought, hitting a key all wrong and making a nasty sound that has her gritting her teeth. She flattens her hands across the keys, takes a breath and stretches her back and looks around. The girl she had been doing this left just an hour ago to get to some of her classes, and since Jenny only had to work this afternoon and didn't feel like driving home only to come back later, she'd stuck around the empty room with permission. Someone else had reserved it after that, though, and she already plans on making a beeline for a library once they come in.

She checks her watch. She still has time, plenty of it, and rests herself for a minute. A drink of water, stretching her fingers out, cracking her knuckles before she flips to the beginning of the music again to start over.

her fingers falter again

that nasty sound comes again

this time because she looks up and sees a figure in the doorway, jumps from the fear of not knowing how long they've been there


she stops fast, doesn't see who it is yet (probably doesn't even consider it because why would she be here?) and turns too fast to shove her bottle of water into her bag and stand, "Sorry, I thought I had the room for another--"

(why would she be...)

Jenny's usual smile drops out when she finally realizes that it's Cora Sterling in the doorway, her heart seems to fall into her stomach, her look turns exhausted and cold and she's on edge, disliking that if anyone were to hear her it had to be... (why would she be...)

"What? Do you go to school here now or something?"
Sep 30 2016, 03:48 PM
and change somebody's life
Cora Sterling & Jenny DuNyl


thread warnings: stalking, unhealthy relationships, self harm / suicide ideation, violent thoughts
outfit: (x)




She comes here sometimes, alone.

It's strange, she supposes. Most people come with friends and family and cameras to take pictures, and she thinks of bus rides with Cora and her where they'd plan to hunt ghosts together. But, Cora was the only one she ever went with.

She's in one of the lower rooms, fingers touching a bannister covered in dust. Once they'd tried to hide here, spend the night searching for ghosts to tell them stories of the past. They were caught, immediately, sent home with a call to their "parents".

And, like most of those things that she only ever did with Cora, today she does them alone

when she wants to hurt herself with nostalgia.

What she always thinks of, but never wants and never expects...

is what happens today.

Which is, she's the only one left. It's half an hour to closing. And, suddenly, Cora walks through the door.

(Theres a thousand things Jenny DuNyl has imagined saying to her and not one comes out. She's at a bannister, by a staircase marked employees only

and, like the coward she is, bolts down it before Cora can turn her way.)
Sep 1 2016, 02:25 PM
warnings for: mentions of parental abuse/neglect, obsessive thoughts
outfit: x




In case anyone was completely unaware, which they probably are as the fucked up and strange relationship you can see between two girls who simultaneously love and hate each other isn't one of interest to most townsfolk, Jenny has complicated feelings about Blueberry Fest.

No one who knows her will be surprised at all to know that it's... pretty much the exact same as her complicated feelings for one Cora Sterling, daughter of the Blueberry Tycoons who gained the most from this festival.

Generally, she wouldn't even go. She'd hole up inside, only leave once her classes started, and go the long way around.

Not this time.

They've actually spoken to each other this time. Scattered antagonistic words, but it was still speaking and it made Jenny itch at the idea of seeing Cora again. (Her father has come and gone, still disappointed with nothing kind to say

Cora was right, he hated the blueberry pie, he hated sweets, he hated her cooking because it was a useless skill.)

She comes down, trying to pretend it isn't her intention to accidentally-on-purpose run into Cora. But, she gets caught up in the idea of what she'd say when or if she did that accidentally

not on purpose

she runs into someone she does know.

***


She stops in her tracks when her shoulders collide with the older woman's, turning back with a large and apologetic smile before it falters.

She's forgotten Kris's name, exactly. And she feels like checking her phone for it would be too much like cheating.

"Oh, it's you. K..."
Aug 16 2016, 07:01 PM
warnings for parental abuse and neglect, mentions of self harm and suicidal ideation, slut shaming




DEMOGRAPHICS

Full name: Evelyn Jennifer DuNyl
Birthdate & age: June 6, 1995 | 22
Gender & pronouns: girl | she / her
Orientation: gyneromantic gray asexual and in the closet

Nationality: American
Occupation/Major: clerk at UMM's bookstore | undeclared major
SES/social class: upper middle class
Education level: 3rd year in college
Languages known: English
Physical/mental conditions: avoidant personality disorder with some borderline tendencies, depression w suicidal ideation

APPEARANCE


Ethnicity: biracial black/white
Height and build: 5'1" and scrawny tbh, she def does not eat enough or take v good care of herself
Hair color/style: long gingery curls that she usually ties back out of her face
Voice/manner of speaking: kind of soft, always ending stuff in a question? can be verrrrrry phony cheerful and "sweet" in a "please don't be mad at me" sort of way. when she does a 180 and snaps at someone it becomes about 50 times sharper and she can hit yelling point fast when she gets here
Distinguishing marks: self harm scars on her hands and fingers mostly, covered in freckles

Fashion/way of dress: Jenny very much emphasizes comfort over style and is prone to ratty jeans, worn in sneakers, and leggings. She likes the color blue and nautical themed things and has been known to wear jumpers and rompers a lot because they're easy and comfortable. The other 1% of the time, Claire's probably dressing her and putting make up on her face and stuff, which is nice and she definitely looks hella cute in a nice skirt or dress but haha yeah that's usually too much okay.

99% of the time she has her hair pulled back, either in with a headband or tied with a hairtie or scrunchie to keep it away from her face.

General impression: The first thing most people notice about Jenny's posturing is how much she smiles and how phony her smile is. It's definitely too tight, a nervous thing that stretches over her face like she's about to cry or scream at any minute. She's short already, but she seems to want to make herself even smaller when she moves around because she often slouches or slumps, hunching her shoulders as if trying to protect from something.

She's absolutely the sort of person who dances out of the way whenever anyone comes near her, she laughs nervously and apologizes too much and sometimes, on a bad day, you can hear an edge to her voice like she's going to snap.

PERSONALITY

Likes:
+ Cooking
+ Being useful to others
+ Music
+ The pets she shares with Claire
+ Cute nautical things
+ Sweets
Dislikes:
- Herself
- Her father
- Her temper
Fears: She's very much afraid of not being "worth" being alive or the idea that she's "useless". She works extra hard to make everyone think that they should keep her around.
Dreams/Goals: To make her father admit she has some use okay.
Strengths: quick to share things with others even if she doesn't know them well, very readily helps where people need her
Flaws: quick to anger and blurt out the first nasty thing that comes to mind in which she starts to hate herself immediately after, has very little regard for herself and pretty much thinks she's The Worst and will tell anyone who asks, very very distant actually with others
Quirks: prone to sharing food or anything with anyone, has perfect pitch and has had a fairly easy time learning how to play instruments and understand music, that smile of hers

What puts your character at ease: laying in bed and staring at the wall, playing music, cooking
What makes your character uncomfortable: being around most people because she feels like she has to put up an act, being around her father most of all
Soft spots/vulnerabilities: her feelings of "not being good enough", her father, being called "Evelyn", Cora Sterling
How they try to come across to others: :) quiet wallflower who will do whatever you want shh it's okay she's useful
What they try to hide about themselves: everything else, especially her temper and violent thoughts
How they really feel about themselves: she's a waste of space, she's terrible, she's mean and cruel and no one should be around her because all she does is hurt them or test them

Character traits: Jenny DuNyl is an incredible mess of contradictions and peeling layers that sometimes all show themselves at once. Let's break it down.

The topmost layer: is a very bland, careful blank slate of a human being who always smiles. This is who she wants to be, someone who others can put their fingers in and mold this way and that and come out Exactly What You Need At Any Time. Others will look at her and not see much there, and the most they can really say about this layer is "sweet, I guess?"

That is, until it starts to peel to: a weary nervous kid who's absolutely terrified of other people knowing about her flaws and inadequacies. Seen often when her smile falters, she fidgets and shifts and twists her hair around her fingers. If she tries to be playful, throw out her own two cents, and is rejected Jenny backs down and backtracks immediately, trying to make herself seem like that blank slate again.

If it doesn't work, more cracks appear and you see:

the next layer, a bitter angry person who judges everyone far too much. It slips out when she doesn't think anyone's listening, sarcastic, dry, downright mean things she says. She'll roll her eyes, make snide comments, et cetera until she realizes someone heard her and they disagree and then she starts backtracking again. But, if you press and peel some more there's:

more anger. Violent thoughts. Snap ideas and thoughts about using her hands to tear someone's skin off, dig into their body, pull out blood, scream and hit and rip. These thoughts shake her, and when they come out it's often limited to a quick blow up, yelling and saying every nasty thing she's ever thought and then retreating back into herself, hating herself even more.

It's even worse when she does get violent.

The last layer, at Jenny's very core, is unhappy. Miserable and depressed and hating herself and wanting to prove to everyone who's ever loved her that they'll leave her too because she's just The Worst. She pushes and pushes people away, makes herself distant, and then comes in close again clinging to others and testing them over and over and over again until they finally can't stand her anymore.

In short: Jenny DuNyl is kind of a mess.

LIFESTYLE & PHILOSOPHY


What are your character’s thoughts on…
-- Substance use: she doesn't do them often but she doesn't say no if someone offers
-- Sex/romance: she's absolutely afraid of it, she gets obsessive and imagines violent things when she thinks of sex and romance more than almost anywhere else
-- Marriage/children: doesn't deserve it / would fuck them up
-- Religion: her parents were atheist, she's agnostic
-- Politics: leans liberal but doesn't actually have enough knowledge to care very much
-- Technology: has a working understanding and a Facebook or whatever but she doesn't use it often. she definitely has a Pinterest for recipe ideas.

How social are they?: she'll talk to anyone but she doesn't like to :)
Types of people they like:
Types of people they dislike:
Social profile: (who in town knows them? Knows of them? For what?)

Saving/spending habits: (are they thrifty? extravagant?)
Recreational activities: (e.g. hobbies / clubs / sports / what they do on weekends)

EDUCATION


Major/Favorite subject:
GPA:
How do they feel about their school?:
How studious are they?:
After-school/part time job: (if any)

FAMILY & HOME

Significant relatives / pets:
-- Zacharias Thurston-DuNyl (51, father)
-- Miriam DuNyl (deceased @ age 37, mother)

-- Claire Church (34, guardian and the only one who cares maybe)

Relationship with family: :))) she hates her dad while simultaneously wanting him to actually give a shit about her maybe!

Current residence:
Description of bedroom/living space: bare, looks like she just moved in even though she's lived there for years, she has a few textbooks on a desk and a desktop computer in her room, but the walls are bare and the bedding is scarce and bland.

BACKGROUND


Place of birth/hometown:
General history: shitty neglectful dad and dead mom, both STEM geniuses.

moved to monroeville when she was 12 bc her dad was tired of dealing w her oops.

met cora sterling, had a weird friendship/romantic relationship, then flipped on her when she slept with someone. mostly to self-destruct the relationship. rip.

How their past affects them: mega abandonment issues thanks dad, thinks she's worthless thanks dad, gets angry and defensive really easy bc she was never taught how to parse emotions well THANKS DAD
Character’s feelings about their past: :) why isn't she dead yet she asks herself every day
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